Remember when you were a kid and your parents always gave you that one annoying maxim? They would repeat over and over till it drove you up the wall.
Well my dad’s was “It’s all about your attitude.” From the time I was 5 to 18 I heard this repeatedly any time I had to go into a situation that I wasn’t looking forward. Unfortunately, I think I was entirely unable to figure out what he meant until I was about 25 years old.
What I learned at that point, when the saying finally clicked, was that a situation is completely dependent on what you believe it to be. This is true whether that event is in the future, the present, or the past.
If the event is in the future how you go into it will completely affect the experience and the outcome. Usually if you anticipate the game, practice, social event, or whatever else is going to go terrible then it will. You will play poorly and you certainly will not have any fun.
The positive aspects of the situation you are currently in hangs in the balance of your attitude as well. If you are currently in a tough moment or just one that isn’t much fun how can you reframe it and use it to your benefit? The last thing you want to is regret not taking advantage of a situation when you had the chance to make something great.
Looking back at something that went wrong or maybe even a time when you know you screwed up? It will indeed continue to hurt and drive you into the ground with guilt unless you can reframe it as a lesson. Instead of “I messed up” tell yourself “I learned….” Not only will this allow you to grow from the situation, but it will also help you let go of it. We hold on to bad memories twice as tightly as we do positive ones. Change it mentally to a positive experience and you will be able to let go of the negative side more quickly.
In order to fully embrace this mindset and approach on life it needs to be a daily practice. Just like everything else, you will get better only if you do it regularly. In the morning look ahead to your day anticipating moments that you will need to cultivate a positive attitude towards. Then hold on to this frame of mind throughout the moment. Lastly, at night before you go to sleep think back through the day and the lessons you learned so that you can apply them to tomorrow.